Krista
Experience the Excitement
[thanks! Selina of selinaloper] Hiya clam-jammers! What’s happening? It’s a perfect mid-June evening, and I’m sitting here typing this with all the windows open. My hair is air-drying from a bath I took a little while ago, and I have peach iced tea and a bowl full of green grapes and a bunny who […]
Baby Just Say Yes
Hiiiii cunny lingerers! How’s by you? Ahhhh I need to tell you I have the best work crush going right now. Eee hee hee we are talking a cute, kinda androgynous, totally mysterious work crush—I don’t know her name, I don’t know what she does at my job, I actually don’t know anything about […]
Boxes Of All Sizes
How’s it goin’, clit whisperers? Everything is lovely here. So calm. As I write this, I have a roast going in the Crock-Pot, almond milk yogurt going in the yogurt maker (yes! I am that dyke!), and a bunneh quietly nibbling tiiiiiny little cabbage wraps stuffed with parsley and cilantro. My apartment is clean. There […]
Heart of Glass
Hi oyster shuckers! What’s happening? Over here in Chicago, it’s been weird-weathering for weeks. Nothing like what you faggettes have on the East Coast, but seriously. In January, we had a 24-hour period in which it was almost 70 degrees one day and raining warm rain—I mean I saw two kids laughing hysterically and […]
Playing XBox
Hi there, vagina-diners! Greetings from the black hole of time. Jeez. In the two months since we’ve talked, we’ve had Mitt Romney vanish like a bad dream and we’ve survived an almost-apocalypse. (Two totally unrelated events.) Thanksgiving, Christmas, Chanukkah and New Years came and went and took their annual reign of terror with them. […]
Today On a Very Special ELECTION EDITION of Effing Dykes: In Which We Lose Our Shit Entirely
Hiiii canyon-yodelers ! Everyone take a really deep breath. Innnnhale…… annnnnnnnd exhale. AGGGGGH IT’S NOT HELPING. OK I can’t. I just really cannot. *Warning* This post is about THE ELECTION. It’s not specifically about dykes or gaydar. (I mean, the election has everything to do with dykes in general, but stop here if you […]
The Body Electric
Hiiii vadge-badgers! How’s it goin’??? Over here in Chicago, the weather has stopped hot-boxing us at last. Thank gawd. It’s finally cool again, and Chicago’s teacher strike is finally over. This is excellent news, not just because teachers deserve better pay and conditions and benefits and respect for the incredibly challenging and important fucking […]
All in the Femme-ily
Haaaaay snatch-snackers! What’s happening? TONS is happening ’round these parts. (Heh.) Over here, as I write this righthissecond, I’m looking over at CJ, who is doing this: She is honest-to-god asleep like that. If I were a better person, I’d wake her up and take her shoes off and tuck her in instead of photographing […]
Top That
Morning, doughnut-glazers! Holy shit. Hooooly shit. Y’allfags? Before we can talk about anything else ever again, I need to tell you a really humiliating story, mmkay? Total Seventeen magazine “I-got-my-period-for-the-first-time-during-our-school-play-wearing-white-tights” moment. It just happened. I am dying. I am dying. But! *Warning* This story is sliiiightly gross, and it’s about human-body stuff. Now I know […]
How do we define cheating in lesbiqueer circles?
Hiya slit-ticklers! I’ve missed you! And it’s warm out! It’s finally warm out!! Chicago’s beaches are open and sundresses are in season and the question “But do they have a patio?” is now the only determining factor in whether or not I’m going out. Each summer I make up a new motto, and this […]