Oh vanity – fucking corrupted interpretation of all that can only be seen with tainted human eyes – how have we allowed ourselves to believe in such delusional reflections? Not only believe – but feel and decide and live and choke – on the deepest sigh we could possibly sigh – because we do not see what the world is telling us we are supposed to see. Painful reflection telling us that we are simply not good enough, hot enough, young enough, beautiful enough, thin enough, athletic enough, strong enough – screaming in our face – we are not enough.
“We are so vain that we even care for the opinion of those we don’t care for.” – Marie Von Ebner-
We crawl into our holes of discontent and we wallow in the distorted belief that we need to look a certain way to be valued in this world. We fall into corners of depression because we are no longer lean, mean and seventeen. We doubt our worth and question our value all based on some objectified parameter we have chosen to be bullied by. We look at the pages of the magazines and envy what is not real. In darkened movie theatres we see faces on the screen with no imperfections and we want to be like them. Golden, toned naked bodies prance down the runways of our imaginations and our hearts drop in deep despair because we don’t resemble what is so obviously adored by the masses.
“Anything in any way beautiful derives its beauty from itself and asks nothing beyond itself. Praise is no part of it, for nothing is made worse or better by praise.” – Marcus Aurelius
What seems to matter to so many in this skewed society of ours is simply not logical – not even almost. What seems most revered has absolutely nothing to do with integrity and strength of character. There is no relationship to internal health or goodness. It is not about generosity of spirit or kindness. It is not about a gentle perception or a loving heart – it is about our physical appearance. It is about numbers on a scale and the girth of a shadow on a wall. It is about waistlines and bust lines, finish lines and blurred lines. It is about hearing how great we look and how much better we appear. And if the praise is not forthcoming or we fool ourselves into believing we are less than perfect because we don’t fit into a fitted size 5 – we take ourselves to the lowest emotional cliff we can cling to – based on the perception of a world that will never know us.
“With the spread of conformity and image-driven superficiality, the allure of an individuated woman in full possession of herself and her powers will prove irresistible. We were born for plenitude and inner fulfillment.” – Elizabeth Prioleau
There is nothing sexier than a woman who knows just how rare and wonderful she really is. There is nothing more attractive than an independent wonderland of voluptuous contradiction. We need to find grace and beauty in the imperfections that define humanity. Run towards the girl with the glasses that lay unbalanced on her freckled nose and wrap your arms around that quirky big boned woman who actually eats the bacon on her bacon cheeseburger. Love the chick that looks like the boy next door and kiss the girl who lives up to her own expectations and not those shoved into her subconscious by soulless propaganda. Do not fear what is defined as unattractive by social media. Do not fall in line and miss the parade of opportunity. Simply embrace what draws you near, what turns you on – what touches your truth – embrace it all.
“The best part of beauty is that which no picture can express.” – P.C.Cast
There should be no humiliation and self degradation when you look into that mirror. That mirror that has no voice or opinion other than the one you give to it. I can say with all certainty that there is no blueprint for beauty. We define it for ourselves. Sometimes life hands us such impossible possibilities. Our truth, and real beauty, is found when we allow ourselves to journey beyond the exterior boundaries that so often stifle us, and land safely inside the walls of perfect chance.
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About K. Guzman
Kathy grew up all over the US - lots of east coast time. She is a surfer girl with an unabridged curiosity. A woman whose mid life awakening continues to bring her to the place she was meant to be. Her degree in Journalism/Creative Writing from the University of Central Florida is being yanked from the archives and put to good use. Her two kids are grown and rock stars in this wild world – her Harley is ready for some serious summer miles – and her heart remains open to life, women and the possibilities each day brings.