I was out doing one of my most favorite things the other day – (not) – when a little girl started screaming at her frazzled mother in the line at the grocery store. “MOM – I WANT IT NOW!!!! BUY THAT FOR ME….I WANT IT!!!!” I gave the little terrorist a side ways glare and told her without words that she was a rotten little punk and if she were my kid she would be digesting a mouthful of Palmolive and wishing through discipline tears that she never opened her sweet little mouth…I have that look down to a science – just so you know. And once again it got me to thinking…Where does the need for wanting come from? I had to ask myself…
In this country, from the time we are little kids, we are inundated with commercialism and advertisements that are directed directly at our subconscious minds. Might as well just stick us in a padded room with no light and flashes of subliminal messages for a few days and get it over with. The result is going to be the same – a society groomed to want – want – want. No explanation or rhyme or reason – we just want one and we want it yesterday. We don’t care how we are going to get it, if we can afford it or even if it is good for us – we just want it. Everyone else has one – I want one too. Weather it is Malibu Barbie and a baseball glove or the 46” plasma and baby blue Beemer convertible with the incredible white leather seats. We want it because we want it. We don’t need any of the things we simply have to have but have them we must. And then I got to thinking – because I have issues – maybe the wanting is not just the want for tangible things but also the want for emotional/non physical things. The need we may have for a best friend, new company, a text buddy, someone to brunch with and drink beer with on a Saturday afternoon. All the happy people in those commercials have happy friends. Everyone on TV has a significant other to banter with – and really – happily ever after never happens in those books unless the princess gets the princess….right?
My girl PINK (and yes – I said MY girl) – used the lyrics, “Have you ever hated yourself for staring at the phone? Your whole life waiting on the ring to prove you’re not alone” – powerful stuff really. Is the craving for companionship a tool ingrained inside of each of us to justify our own existence? When did we lose the ability to just be? To just be simply alone and know that there was nothing wrong with us because of it??
Regardless of where all the preconceptions come from, until we are ok – really ok – all the way ok with whom we are as solitary, independent people who really, truly accept that the things that surround us will never define us – we will never be able to contribute to that loving all involving partnership and love that we deeply crave, want and very possibly need.
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About K. Guzman
Kathy grew up all over the US - lots of east coast time. She is a surfer girl with an unabridged curiosity. A woman whose mid life awakening continues to bring her to the place she was meant to be. Her degree in Journalism/Creative Writing from the University of Central Florida is being yanked from the archives and put to good use. Her two kids are grown and rock stars in this wild world – her Harley is ready for some serious summer miles – and her heart remains open to life, women and the possibilities each day brings.